How is it that these have not made it on to the internet sooner?

In July, Ruby took her first airplane trip. To me this "milestone" wasn't even a blip, didn't even register but we have family members who made sure we remembered it was a big deal. She made her way down to Vegas and I have to say, she handled it all like a champ. Things could have been a lot harder - she really is pretty low maintenance, considering.

I absolutely took too long to write about the trip and I really regret it because you know there are things that we did or said or played or laughed at that could have been fun memories forever if I would have written them down right away. Now they are gone. Escaped me. It makes me sad.

I do, before I forget, want to tell about Ruby's NICU graduate picnic. We never really counted the days that Ruby was in the hospital. I guess once we were in to multiple months, we just didn't really see much of a point. It wasn't a conscious decision we made or anything. Though I must say thinking about it now, I feel good about it, like that only would have made the time go by more slowly. Anyway, they gave us a little t-shirt and there was a space to write in the number of days. We counted. 124 days. We saw a few of Ruby's nurses and a couple of our NNPs and they held her like a normal baby, without any cords or monitors attached. They snuggled her and loved her the way they couldn't when she was a patient and it was lovely. So lovely.

Ruby had PT early this week and, after what Russell felt was a bit of a rough weekend, she gained 4 ounces in 4 days. We are still holding our breath every time she eats.

Speaking of eats - I cannot stop baking! I'm just in the mood. We've been watching Cake Boss on Netflix. That must be it. Let me just tell you, my scratch vanilla cake recipe? Perfected. No lie. Tonight I'm thinking banana bread scones but I promised Russell chocolate chip cookies. Both maybe?

Instagram is awesome but it makes me so lazy! I've been posting pictures there instead of updating here.

Ruby gained 6 ounces this week; she weighs 10 pounds, 8.5 ounces. Yes, we really are counting by the half ounce. It's so crazy. I keep wondering at what point we're going to feel comfortable and whether feeding her is ever going to be like feeding a normal healthy baby. Will the day ever come?

The longer I am back to work, the more comfortable people are with asking about her. When people ask how she is, all I ever talk about is eating and weight gain because those are our only problems! Really though, they are asking about her brain and whether they think she is going to have any disabilities. Ruby didn't have any bleeding in her brain but we won't really rule anything out until she is pretty old. At this age, the biggest indication that something isn't right is any delay in motor development. Physical therapy comes to the house every week and we do range of motion exercises and keep pretty close track of her motor skills. Right now, as far as motor control is concerned, Ruby is ahead - she does more than a 3 month old would be doing. We give her a little bit of a break and assess whether she's meeting milestones by her corrected age, that is, how old she would be if she came when she was supposed to. She's still the size of a newborn but isn't all floppy like a newborn. Sometimes we wonder if she feels like she's a 7 month old trapped in a newborn baby's body. Today, we don't have any signs that Ruby's brain isn't totally normal.

Are there other things? Things you want to know but feel too scared to ask? You know what I think? I think it's better just to ask. It helps me keep a little perspective. I get caught up in what's going on this second and forget a little about how lucky we are that Ruby is even around at all. Doesn't it just make you want to go to church just thinking about it? Plus I love talking about how awesome my baby is...

Ruby slept for 8 hours Friday. It makes us nervous because if she's sleeping, she's not eating and we are obsessed with eating. We know we should be jumping up and down cheering but we've had a little trouble relaxing.

I got up with her and gave her a bottle and then we turned on Sleepless in Seattle and fell asleep on the couch. It's weird how having a baby can be so crazy busy and lazy at the same time.

I will pay anything for convenience these days. Before Ruby came, I would scoff at the guy walking home from the gas station with a gallon of milk. I thought to myself, dude, you probably paid 6 times what that gallon of milk costs at the grocery store, you are a moron. Guess what I did yesterday. I NEVER want to go to the grocery store.

I hate bringing Ruby's car seat with me anywhere. I can't really stop thinking about the germs. I don't know if I read something about it or what. Anyway, I always take her out of the car seat, put her in the Moby, and run the errand. It's great. When you have one errand. Sucks SO bad when you have more than one! In and out and buckling and unbuckling. Horrible. So, these days I skip the grocery store and make one stop. Target. You can buy milk at Target, even if it's not a Super Target and yeah, it's at least twice as much but the convenience of only having to make one stop. It's priceless. Priceless I tell you.

I can't stop staring at this picture. Look at how fat she looks. She's sitting on the scale - 9 lbs 3 ounces.

Our Vegas trip is planned for July which means I'm in the market for a baby bathing suit (why am I so excited about this?). If you see anything spectacular, give me a heads up. I already passed on the Juicy string bikini from Nordstrom Rack. Maybe I better go back...

That's a neck roll. Can you see? Ruby weighs 9 pounds 3 ounces this week. She has had really good weight gain over the last three weeks. Tonight, we're going to let her sleep as long as she wants.

She really makes us work for the smiles.

She's ready for Dad time

Ruby was passed out after about 2 minutes of PT today. It's okay. We got the most important thing done - Ruby weighs 8 lbs 11 ounces.

She had two weeks of big gains so this week we are going to start feeding her ad lib - let her tell us when she's ready to eat. It's actually stressing me out more than feeding her on a schedule. Wish us luck.

Oh come on

Nothing new to report. Last week Ruby gained 5.5 ounces. We switched to a regular formula (no prescription - you can buy it anywhere!) and she's going after those bottles like a champ!

Ruby has a bunch of 2 month post discharge follow ups this week and Russell has finals so we are pretty busy.

She has started to smile at us and she is this close to sucking her thumb which I find myself encouraging - I hate reinserting the pacifier every 2 seconds.

Can you believe how perfect she is?

Feeding Ruby is a lot less stressful these days.

7 lbs 3 ounces!

Look at that bum

Going strong on her bottles.

Weight check tomorrow

He stares at her while she sleeps

Ruby's NG tube has been out since last Friday. On Tuesday we weighed her and she gained 2 ounces. She stresses us out - sometimes taking an entire bottle, sometimes barely an ounce - but she is getting the job done. We will weigh her again tomorrow morning. She got me off the hook for my library late fee today so we're cool.

Ruby weighs 6 lbs 12 ounces this week. Her bottle feeding progress is really hard for us to gage because we're so focused on the one we just gave and she's so inconsistent. Sometimes she'll take a whole one, sometimes half, sometimes we can barely get 10 mls in to her and there doesn't seem to be a common denominator. We're giving her a bit of a test over the next few days and we are going to start feeding her just what she will take by the bottle and nothing through her NG. Hopefully she's ready to make the connection and we'll have progress.

Otis isn't getting enough sleep these days either.

Bridgie is here. Rubers is happy.

We didn't make it 24 hours without the NG. What a let down. It's really hard to wake up a baby to feed her and I think the frustration is starting to wear on us. Yesterday she was out so cold, we didn't even try to wake her up. We gavaged the whole bottle. Someday she's going to want to eat all the time. I can't wait.

Here is the Moby wrap. Oh man, I love it. It may be way too hot in the summertime but I would absolutely invest in another one if there is a more breathable fabric. This weekend it will be in the 70's and Ruby and I will be strolling the neighborhood.

NG is still out and Ruby weighs 6 lbs 4 ounces.

I know what you are thinking. I'm a slacker. Sorry, man. I have a problem. I NEVER want to put this baby down. I don't even want to put her down to go to the bathroom. And it's not easy going to the bathroom holding a floppy baby. Well, she's not floppy but you know when they kind of throw their heads around more than they mean to.

Ruby pulled out her NG tube last night and we're giving her a trial run without it. Her last bottle took an hour to get down and she was pretty drool-y. We will see how the next one goes. I keep threatening her but I'm not sure I'm getting anywhere. She was much more agreeable while her aunts were here.

I've been trying to set a goal for every day. Nothing too lofty. Nothing lofty at all in fact. One day it was take a shower. Another day it was do one load of laundry. Yesterday it was go for a jog. Today it was take Ruby on a walk. I have to go ahead and give myself a little pat on the back because every day that I set a goal, I met it. And even though they are really things I have to do anyway, it feels like we accomplished something. And that always feels good, doesn't it?

Plus, Ruby saw the surgeon yesterday. For the last time. AND she weighed 6 pounds 1 ounce. So excellent.

Here's Rubes in her Moby wrap. She loves it. I love it. I'll tell you all about it tomorrow (maybe that's my goal).

She is 5 pounds 10 ounces. Just barely meeting her weight gain goal. Some days she will wolf down almost her whole bottle every time. Other days, we can't wake her up for anything. We know she can do it, she just needs to want to.

Russell is really good at swaddling her.

I think he loves her.

Usually when I have the curtains open, Otis will bark at ANYTHING that walks/drives/rolls by. He's not barking.

Ruby liked St Patrick's Day more than she let on.

I'll be working on a better pic for you, CM...

First Drs appointment (& first trip out of the house)? Done. Ruby is up! She is presently 5 pounds 7 ounces and 17 1/4 inches long. Our goal weight gain is 3-7 ounces per week. She'll have another weight check next Thursday.

She's really wasted after all that laying around and having people look at her.

Ruby has her first appointment with her pediatrician in less than an hour and a half. Now the question is: how long is it going to take us to get out the door? Crap. I still haven't showered. And wait, what goes in this diaper bag, again?

I hope you can excuse me - I can't be blogging right now. I have to go report to the authorities that be that Ruby's place of residence has changed.

No luck getting home tonight. Our neonatologist wants to see Ruby gain weight again tomorrow. I will weigh her at 2:30 this morning. I've never been so excited to wake up at 2:30 in the morning.

She was up all night and she slept all day. Russell didn't sleep at all either and he had class at 7:30. I spent the entire day here. How many hours has it been since I've left this place? I don't want to count. We laid around in bed all day long. Right now I'm reading a book/staring at Russell & Ruby - they are both sleeping.

Here is Russ trying to get Ruby's diaper changed. Every time he turned around to throw away his wipes, she was going again. 4 diapers later the job was done.

We're going home this week.

Russell is taking baby CPR, we're doing a carseat study and tonight we're spending the night with Ruby. Would it be weird to get pizza delivered to our hospital room?

Here's rooting for Tuesday!!

Oh, come on

Wait, look at this one.

It's like she's asking, "why are you doing this to me?"

5 lbs 4 ounces

We scored one of these recliner chairs a couple days ago and yesterday I fell asleep while we were snuggling. Cheri, one of our favorite NNPs, came around the corner and snapped a pic. She thought it was funny that Ruby was awake.

Not much to report. Still working on bottle feeding. Ruby's surgeon signed off and said he would see her in his office in 3 weeks.

We brought home a pacifier and Otis got a hold of it. I have no idea how. Eventually it ended up in several pieces. We're not sure if it was an act of aggression or excitement.

Look how peaceful she looks. I know they say never wake a sleeping baby but Ruby got her PICC line pulled last night and I couldn't wait to put her little right arm through a sleeve! She is getting all her calories from breast milk. She doesn't need IV nutrition anymore! Thank you to Great Grandma Gibbons and Aunt Debbie for the cute outfit! I love these little pants! (I can't stop with the exclamation points! Sorry.)

Doesn't she look so long? 16 & 1/4 inches.